By Ken Musaba
I came to realize that most of the upcoming parents have fears on the world misfortunes that might befall their children. most people that our children trust are the ones who end up messing up their lives.
Just the other day I heard my nephew sing a rap song with very distasteful words. He was actually dancing to these words “you can grab girls by their titties, coz they be bouncy like a trampoline “Call me Methuselah but I was shocked. This boy of 6 years old should be learning his ABC’s and not singing such explicit song. And it dawned on me that my daughter, when I get one will leave in such an environment. Talk of shivers. You see this young nephew of mine is already on autopilot, he is been programmed that it’s okay to grab girls by their titties coz they be bouncy like trampoline (God Forgive me). It never occurred to me how dangerous and hard life is for young girls and women out there .Much respect.
Today we need to talk about sexual abuse, but I want to focus on the girl child. Not that I am saying boy child don’t get abused nor am I saying that is a minor case. In fact a lot of young men get abused and most of them go with it to their grave because they had no one to talk to or felt ashamed to speak up. But you have to agree girls suffer more and funny thing is pop culture and social media is making it a norm.
I will share with you scenarios of sexual abuse from friends who once shared their painful stories with me. Angela* was raped by her biological father when she was 12. The same dad raped her siblings. She died of Aids when she was in form three. He had infected her with HIV. She felt betrayed by the very same man who brought her into this world. Nancy a very beautiful soul with an infectious laughter was sexually abused at age 10 by a boy who was four class ahead of her. The predator pushed her on the wall and had his way with his fingers. Luckily for her she came out of it with the help of an aunt. Last but not the least Leah* was sitting in a matatu going home from school, at form two, she was sited next to man that would pass as a pastor, from the way he was dressed. So guess what? The man decided its time to unzip my pants and let this young innocent thing see his penis .Displaying it like it’s some type of trophy. So Leah decided to share this ordeal with her mother and the mom was like” what were you wearing?” to her parents they are sure the way she dressed was the reason for this.
These are just but a few of the sexual abuse cases, some come out of it but others don’t survive it. The thought of my daughter waking up in the middle of the night in hot sweats give me chills. oh! I pray that my little angle never live in constant fear, I don’t want my girl to always be armored with pepper spray. I want her to walk in the streets like a free bird, ready to conquer the world. For that to happen, we, the men should teach our sons and nephews ( in my case) how to respect women at a young age. someone once said that Silence is an active violence ,so let’s all speak up for our daughters sake.
We should always be mindful on what we saying and do in front of a child. Children don’t just from school but their learning starts at home. Let’s protect their innocence and tell them where they go wrong. As for my nephew am dealing with him and I think he will one day be an advocate for women’s right.
Ken Musaba is a journalist at Mtoto News, focusing on parenting.
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